To pray, I think does not mean to think about God in contrast to thinking about other things, or too spend time with God instead of spending time with other people. Rather, it means to think and live in the presence of God. All our actions must have their origin in prayer. Praying is not an isolated activity; it takes place in the midst of all the things and affairs that keep us active. In prayer a " self centered monologue" become a God centered monologue."
Knowledge alone cannot save us. When St. Augustine coined that phrase nearly seventeen hundred years ago he meant it as a principle of truth, but he was writing a commentary on his own life. Augustine, as we know, had two conversions, one in his head, the other in his heart. at age twenty-five, he converted to Christianity, intellectually. after years of experimenting with various pagan philosophies and ways of living, he was now convinced in his head that Christianity was correct. The rest of him, however was not willing to convert. For nine more years, until he was thirty- four years old, he was unable to bring his moral life into harmony with his intellectual faith. It was during these years he not infrequently prayed his infamous prayer:" " Lord make me a good and chaste Christian, but not yet."
We see from that example that it is not enough just to know the truth, to have clarity of conviction, and to know where ideally our lives should be heading, though that can be a valuable start. There is also the question of heart, of energy, of willpower, of sustaining ourselves on the road. The spiritual life is not a quick sprint to a well marked finish line, a marathon,an arduous lifelong journey into a journey into a ever-widening horizon. To sustain ourselves on that road, even after we have some assurance that we are on the right road, requires that along the way we continually what metaphorically might be termed " Elijah's Jug," namely, the substance that God promised to provide to those who are walking toward the divine mountain. Obviously, Augustine dictum notwithstanding, that is important, with out vision we perish. The heart needs guidance from the head, you must fall in love with your faith (Jesus). Anyone who has ever known the truth, but felt tired, lonely, lazy, bitter, or addicted to old habits to move toward it can testify to. We need knowledge and heart. The time is fast approaching when one will either be a mystic or an unbeliever.
Thus to be a believer today is to live in moral loneliness. To sustain faith today is not to vote with the majority, but to stand outside of the dominant conscience. One can no longer simply roll with the flow one's own particular community, even one's faith community, if one wishes to have a living faith. Remember we stand alone at judgment, and by our faith in Jesus Christ, he stands next to us, telling the Father he's one of ours. It is no longer enough to be born in a Christian family, to have been baptized, or even to be part of a worshipping community. None of these alone, opens the doors to the kingdom of heaven. This is evident, not just because so many people ( including many of our own children) are drifting away from Christianity, but because, even within our churches, it is easier to have faith in a code of ethics, in Jesus moral teachings, in God's call for justice and in human value of gathering as a community, than it is to have a personal faith. Too often what we have, in fact is not "Christianity" but an ideology of Christianity.
What are these anti-faith forces? These are the forces around us that tempt us away from prayer, from self sacrifice, from being more communal, from being willing to sweat blood in the garden. in order to keep our integrity and commitments, and from mustering of the time and courage to enter into our own souls. Hence they are not abstract, foreign forces. They live in the house with us and are as comfortable to us a old worn shoe. What blocks our faith is that myriad of innocent things within our ordinary,, normal lives which precisely makes our lives comfortable: our laziness, our self-indulgence, our ambition, our restlessness, envy, our refusal to live in tension, our obsession with a certain life style, our perpetual tiredness. So how do we become mystics in the midst of all this. all classical writers, from every tradition, suggest one road beyond all of this, " Private prayer."
How do we develop the heart to sustain ourselves on the long road to Christ? How do we move beyond our "fatigue" from loneliness, laziness, bitterness, and bad habits so as to become gracious, happy, self sacrificing, adult Christians? ( story of a detective novel, we know the ending. Be happy).
What do we do during those times, when as "Henri Nouwen" puts it, to tired to read the gospels, too
restless to have spiritual thoughts, too depressed to find words for God, or too exhausted to do anything. What practices are helpful for us as we struggle as Christians to live healthy spiritual lives?
From the Bible, on down, through the early church fathers, through medieval theologians, through great reformers, through great mystics, through the founders of religious orders, down to Henri Nouwen, these are the spiritual practices you see everywhere emphasized.
We are to set a time to spend apart from God. As Henri Nouwen assures us, that time apart will keep us centered, even when it does not feel as if we are praying or making headway: He says: my time...
apart is not a time of deep prayer, nor a time in which I experience a special closeness to God; it is not a period of serious attentiveness to the divine mysteries . I wish it were!
But the simple fact of being in the presence of God and showing him all that I feel, think, sense and experience, without trying to hide anything, must please him. I know he loves me, even though I do not feel that human love, as I can feel a human embrace, even though I do not hear a voice as I hear human words of consolation, even though I do not see a smile, as I can see in a human face. Still God speaks to me, looks at me, and embraces me there, where I am unable to notice it.
But prayer is more than just saying prayers, just as mysticism is more than a question of merely seeking God, through formal prayer.
Right after John the Baptist is murdered, Jesus desires a time of solitude, with his disciples, and goes up into the mountains to pray, yet he is moved to perform one of the greatest miracles, feeding of the five thousand.
Jesus demonstrated His power over the laws of nature when He fed the Five-thousand and walked on water. John's unfair execution disturbed Jesus deeply, but He could not escape either the crowds of people or his disciples. Yet, Jesus showed compassion on the people and met their needs. Jesus gave his disciples inspiration, when he told Peter to come on, and Peter doesn't have to be told twice.
Its not every day that you can walk on water through waves that are taller than you are. The first steps go well. But a few strides out onto the water, and he forgets to look to the one who got him there in the first place, and down he plunges. His response may lack class, but it gets him out of deep water. "help Me! "
And since Peter would rather swallow his pride than water, a hand comes through the rain and pulls him up.
The message is clear!
As long as Jesus is one of many options, He is no option. As long as you can carry your burdens alone, you don't need a burden bearer . As long as your situation brings no grief, you will receive no comfort. As long as you can take him, or leave him, you might as well leave him, because he won't be taken half- heartedly. In this day of falling church attendance, conflict within congregations, the missing of the "Holy Spirit,' within these congregations, becomes clear. the importance of prayer, with going deeply within ourselves to see how we match up with Jesus expectations of us. Look around the congregation for the gifts of the Holy Spirit, see if they are being seen. The fruits of the spirit is " Love, Joy, Peace, longsuffering, gentleness, Goodness, Faith, against such there is no law.
If you don't see these gifts within your congregation, please pray immediately.
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